Ok. The other day I asked Tracy Grimshaw to have coffee with me.
I think anyone who knows me knows that I’m quite partial to Tracy. She’s the reason I watch commercial televison and my answer to every ‘Which celebrity would you….’ question.
You might remember she recently followed me on Twitter, which I can only imagine happened out of a mixture of pity and annoyance. I was pretty excited. Actually, I was more than excited. I did a dance, high-fived myself and called my closest friends. I’d actually become a blip on Tracy Grimshaw’s radar. Did life get any sweeter? Even when my mother questioned why she’d be following me, I soldiered on. Turns out everyone’s a critic.
After my excitement died down a little bit, I started to think. She’s my most favourite and bestest celebrity ever. What harm could come of asking her to have a coffee with me? That, right there, is probably where I went wrong. Why on earth would Tracy Grimshaw want to have a coffee with me? I was nervous but I wanted to take a shot. I wanted to see if the journalist I’d loved since I saw her hypnotise a yabby around ten years ago would want to hang out with me.
So I became courageous. Like ninja courageous. As I sat on my couch, I started to think seriously about it. I could, in actual fact, send her a direct message on Twitter and ask her casually to have a coffee with me the next time she was in Brisbane.
The simplicity of the plan was what appeared to make it so genius. Even my usual self-doubting inner dialogue became excited. ‘Oh wow, Tysoe! Yes! What a great idea! She’s a journalist. You’re doing a post graduate degree in journalism. She has great hair. You have great hair. You could, in actual fact, be sisters! She would love to have coffee with a complete stranger! Tysoe – you’re a genius and not at all weird for thinking this way’.
Spurred on by some friends (and ok I admit it – my unusually positive inner voice), I spent more time than I care to admit to composing a message. It was going to be the key. It needed to be both casual & professional but also include my signature charm, humour and sophistication. What a breeze. I set to work immediately.
Five days later I had an ok message but an almost silent inner voice. Shit. Regardless, it was ‘go‘ time. I couldn’t delay any longer. The night I sent the message, I spent about three hours building up the courage to do it. Unfortunately, I had to do it sober as drinking might have made me too confident and thus far too chatty and that could have been completely disasterous.
I almost hurled. My hands were shaking and I felt my body go completely cold. I called friends who talked me out of whatever doubts had come swirling up inside me the minute I sent the message. They were great. I felt better. Sort of. It’s been three months and she hasn’t responded. She probably won’t, which is ok.
The great part about all of this is that I asked Tracy Grimshaw to have a coffee with me. My most favourite celebrity in the whole wide world. I was shaking and almost hurled but I managed to do it. I feel brave and pretty cool and even though a little bit of sick still comes into my mouth every time I think about it, I ASKED TRACY GRIMSHAW TO HAVE A COFFEE WITH ME.
What did you do today?